Translate

Tuesday, July 31, 2018

Life is what happens to you...

After nearly 500 entries in our blog, this is our first post, not in sequential order. This entry marks a stark transition in our U.S. road trip to find a new city to live. Since coming back to the states three months ago we have felt, for the lack of a better word, homeless. The purpose of this road trip was two fold, find a new community to call home and a business that we would like to run. 
   We have driven far and wide, covering many thousands of miles over the last 3 months. We had the awesome pleasure of combining sightseeing along the way, to break up the drive. Still, we didn't have a home, and still most of the places didn't fit. Do you remember what it was like to date? Right person, wrong time, or visa versa or something just didn't click. Imagine dating family-style, where each person is giving input? Though it has been tough on us at times, we are getting closer to the perfect match, where everyone gets something that they want. Once we started to coalesce on an area, our drive then focused on narrow belt in New Mexico and Colorado  
   While driving east on interstate 10, in New Mexico, a fast moving dark cloud approached the highway. Vehicles pulled over and parked or, like us, were in the process of parking. Golf ball size rain drops started pummeling us and in quick order hail, the size of pepper corns started to ping on the windows our roof. Darkness came quickly and then it was impossible to see anything outside of our windows. Our visibility was 100% gone, we couldn't even see the reflection of our headlights on the clouds. The truck started to shake violently, and my daughters and wife screamed as loud as they could in total panic. We felt weightless for a moment and then a sudden jerking pull on the truck. The girls were screaming and talking so fast with each other about what just happened. Elise shouted, "The trailer flipped" though we still could not see anything outside. 
    The blackness quickly broke and the sky turned into the normal dark and grey rainy day that we all know. We had no idea that our truck was still suspended in the air by our load stabilizing bar and chain, which was still connected to the trailer. We were all stunned and my wife and girls were sobbing. The rain was pouring, and through the drops we saw that another RV had been thrown 20 feet off the road and had flipped. I jumped out of my dangling truck to see if the occupants were all right. Many good people joined in the effort to free the two trapped older people and their son. The rain continued to come down in buckets. Once we freed the passengers in the RV, I started to get hypothermia and had to climb back up into my dangling truck and turn on the heater. The kids and Elise were going between frantic rapid talking and deeply emotional crying. They stayed in the truck because of the rain and the fact that we were blocking half of the interstate. 
   Once the rain stopped my family hopped out of the truck so that we could assess our damages a little better. Our trailer's back end was picked up by the wind and moved 25 to 30 feet and crashed on it's side. Since we were still connected to the trailer our eastbound facing truck was yanked and ended up pointing northward after it was all over. The police and other first responders said this was the best accident they saw all year, citing how most end with major injuries or worse. In fact, it was the highway accident unit, officer that let us know that both vehicles were lifted and fell over and gave us the measurements. The other RV was a class C and weighed 25,000 lbs. and is also a total loss. 
   We are so fortunate that we had all of our animals in our truck at the time of the accident. As luck would have it, we brought the cats into the truck in Tucson, AZ. because the heat was getting to a point where the cats would be uncomfortable in the trailer, without AC. That simple act probably saved our cats lives. Otherwise this would have been a devastating outcome for my kids and a heart wrenching post to write about losing best friends. Life is so much more precious and irreplaceable and we mustn't ever forget that.  

 Moments like this serve as punctuation points in life.

Good Samaritans helping trapped people.

That queasy floating feeling.

We blocked interstate 10 for more than 2 hours.

After the rain stopped the kids got out of the truck to inspect the damage.
      
As John Lennon aptly wrote in his song, Beautiful Boy, "Life is what happens to you while you are making other plans." As a family, we are intently and earnestly trying to find a place where all can be happy. Who can predict that this would happen? However, happen it can and it did. 
   We are an extremely close family where all is out on the table all of the time. I know my daughters benefit from seeing unfiltered reality but sometimes it cuts too close to the bone. My daughters have given up so many favorites and yet are still happy. Favorite toys, favorite shirts, and favorite friends  have all been lost. As parents, Elise and I feel guilty about their sacrifices and yet our daughters are thriving, proving that there is a mismatch between our expectations and what truly makes children happy. We have come to realize that kids need love and attention above all, period. Thankfully, we can give that to them in abundance. 
    Tragedy can strike any household but the response to it is what starts the healing process or delays it. For us, sadly, we are all too familiar with loss after losing our home to wildfires in 2011, and after that leaving our relatively new belongings in 2015 for a chance at living a dream, in Latin America. Honestly speaking, loss is loss, whether it burns or floods or deemed a total loss due to an accident, it's gone and the contents deeply missed.
   Learning to let go is crucial to a happy life and though we don't want to admit it, everything is temporal. Loss is the most important lesson I want my daughters to learn after love. Loss can teach us so much about what is really important, that is, if we listen to our hearts. My children have taken losing their home, yet again, with stride and acceptance, though it has been tough. 
   For you parents out there, imagine going into your child's room with a big bucket of sewage water and splash it at random (computer is not off limits). Just splash the bucket of dirty water in your child's room and then say with conviction, that they can only keep half of what they own and only have an hour to decide. My daughters were given that same ultimatum, not because we don't love them, but because their world shrunk from a 250 square foot mobile tiny house on wheels to a 32 square foot truck bed. Some of the stuff was filthy yet contained such sentimental value that we had to salvage it. Items that were financially valuable but not sentimental were separated in the "Maybe, if we have enough room" pile.  Perfectly good items and food were rejected because we did not have enough space to move them. We did not even consider a U-Haul trailer because we have no home to move the stuff to. Where do we haul this stuff? The freedom of our situation sometimes bears a weight that is too difficult to describe. 
    Zoe said, "Dad, I don't want all of this stuff to go to the dump, we should donate it!" In our time of tremendous loss and uncertainty my daughter thought of others. I was so touched, because moving on initially starts in the form of letting go. She offered us a bridge, a bridge of common sense. To us, the kitchen supplies, bicycles, toys, and countless personal objects still meant something to us, so giving them away was both emotional and cathartic. Our items that we gave away were less than 3 months old and were bought with intention, after all we are settling down again.
   Our  truck loads of donations were eventually made to a transitional living non profit that helps integrate people back to self sufficiency. I am certain that the circle of life has our happy faces somewhere on that big sphere of love. Either, way we were happy to help because as Zoe said, "It's the right thing to do."   
   What remains for us are precious items that we brought from Nicaragua, mementos from a simpler time. As we embark on this journey for a new home we laugh plenty, are bewildered often, and cry both tears of sorrow and joy frequently. We are living without walls, without stuff and without regret. We just want a place to call home, a place that means something to our souls. Is that too much to ask?   
      

We are lucky we did not end up like the car next to us. Though the damage does not look horrible from afar, when you get close the damage is unending. 

Everything flew and leaked inside the RV.

Cleaning out the RV at the salvage yard the next day.

Sierra and Zoe tried gathering their most prized processions. It was heartbreaking listening to them explain the sentimental value of each object that was damaged by the rain or sewage.

Giving our items a second chance at a worthy cause.

Our hotel room acting like a triage unit for our personal belongings.

We spilled outside our hotel room while separating keep and not keeping piles.

Our most important possessions and our pets survived and that is what is the most important. 

From 250 square feet to 32 square feet, and our new reality.






Monday, July 30, 2018

Elegant Victoria

As cities go, Victoria is a class act and if I were younger or more metropolitan I'd love to call this city home. However, I am neither young nor metropolitan so this city is perfect for a vacation and we would happily revisit this place in the future. This city has a vibrant international flare, is compact, and not too expensive. Victoria is a perfect blend of modern, traditional and seaside cultures. In the U.S. elegant cities like this have been discovered and are both congested and expensive.
   Size does matter, and Victoria's urban sprawl is contained, thus far. So for a family to walk along the harbor, have lunch, and stroll between points of interest is totally feasible. And... if it is doable for a family with youngsters, it's also doable for young lovers on their date nights too. Hence, my original comment about being young in an elegant city like this; It would be wonderful to be young here. There wasn't a seedy-side of town that was readily apparent. Sure there are homeless people here and urban poor but the edginess and scowls were absent. I don't know how Canada does it but even the beggars are polite. Experiencing a larger city, like this, without animus from strangers is "old school cool" and we will not soon forget this place.
 

Harbor views are wonderful

The RV park that we stayed at while in Victoria harbor.

A creative and affordable way to live is on these designer house boats.

Late 19th century construction in town.

Clean and beautiful streets.

Boats ferried people everywhere.

Beautiful park like settings.

A wonderful bed and breakfast on the harbor.

Tour boats come in and drop off the visitors.

The view from our RV park.

Boat rides across the harbor was $6 from our RV park.

Sierra admiring the inlet coastal views of Victoria.

The geese and swans were cruising in front of Sierra and I for more than an hour.


Our RV park really had wonderful views from all sides.

Thursday, July 26, 2018

Butchart Gardens a kaleidoscope of colors

 A Japanese master gardener was brought over in the early 1900s to make a peaceful retreat on Vancouver island for a wealthy Canadian family. From the serene beginnings of the Japanese garden, the worlds most famous garden was created. The Butchart Gardens, just outside Victoria B.C., is a little more than a hundred years old and has amazed people with mother nature's beauty ever since. The flowers, the branches, the leaves and the rocks blend in such pleasing ways that you are literally hypnotized as you walk through at your own pace. You can smell, touch and feel the beauty around you and your senses become overloaded. This is the only man made structure on our entire trip that left us feeling blessed for visiting it. It reminded me that in each of us is a little garden yearning to be tended; and yes, we totally recommend visiting this place.   
The pictures below do not contain captions:
















Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Nanaimo B.C., visiting friends and promises kept

After our abrupt departure from Nicaragua, due to their uprising, our daughters were understandably devastated at the sudden and dramatic loss of their friends. Elise and I, promised them early on that we would make every effort to see their friends so that they could have a proper good bye. We are so happy that it worked out for them to see their buddies in Nanaimo, British Columbia. There are still other friends that we want to see but we are for the time being refocusing on a place to settle down and call home. Thankfully, this is our group decision so there aren't any hurt feelings about us refocusing on a place to live.
    The weather in Nanaimo was stunningly beautiful while we were there. It was mostly sunny with an odd cloud every-now-and-again, gentle breezes and 72 degrees. The people, countryside, and the coastal communities reminded me so much of New Zealand that it was eerie. Wherever we were, the Canadians were warm and friendly and loved to chat. I really noticed how polite the drivers were in Canada towards larger rigs like ours. It was much appreciated when they held back to give us wide berth for our turns. Unlike New Zealand, though, Canada is close and easy to visit.
   The last time we were in Canada, Elise was pregnant with Sierra, when we went to Banff and Jasper, in Alberta. It is remarkable that 13 years has gone by and now we have two kids. Canada is still just as quaint, once you get out of the big cities, as it was back then. We promised each other that whatever business that we buy, we would try to get away for a couple months each year and travel. I hope we can find that.
   In a much earlier blog entry, I mentioned how some parents use their kids as excuses why not to travel (too expensive, too cumbersome etc.) I promise with all I have that your children should be the reason that you travel. Your kids are your most loyal partners and will love you for eternity for showing them something special and meaningful. Most importantly, vacations are not rewards for working hard, they are essential ingredients for living a full life. For each adult reading this, do something cool like a picnic in the fog, or fall asleep to the ripples of a creek in a meadow, or something else unusual and memorable. Get away from it all, with the ones you most cherish. Anyone who has read this blog in the past knows I mean this from the bottom of my heart. 
   

Two friends reconnecting after being separated.

Our ferry ride to Vancouver island.

The vehicles had awesome views too.

Such a beautiful day to be sailing.

When you think of the Pacific Northwest you think of rain, and more rain. A little known secret is that the San Juan islands are in a rain shadow and is much drier than Seattle of Vancouver B.C.

Our drive along the coast of Vancouver island.
Berries are slowly starting to ripen in late July.

Unprompted and unscripted hug, tugged on our heart strings.

Friends are good for your spirit.

Lots of activity in the Nanaimo harbor 

Friends to the end.

This was while walking along the boardwalk in Nanaimo harbor.
Lovely setting in the harbor.

Nanaimo is attracting a lot of foreign investment right now.

The parents are friends too and reminds us of our better times in Nicaragua.

Nice hiking paths around our RV park. The kids played until dark every night there.

Another night of fun while our kids were being cared for by grand parents.

The older kids have more latitude to explore and buy things on their own. 

Breathtaking views from our RV park at night.